Discernment Guide
“I will allure her into the desert and speak to her heart.”Hosea 2:16
A Season of Discernment
God has created you to know and love Him in a totally unique way and has given you a mission that only you can fulfill. You will never regret taking time to discover the gift of your vocation. A dedicated season of discernment helps deepen your relationship with God and allows Him to reveal His plan for your life, resulting in peace and confidence in responding to your vocation.
“God has created me to do Him some definite service. He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another. I have my mission.”Bl. John Henry Cardinal Newman
Time Set Apart
A season of discernment is a time set apart where you are intentionally asking the Lord the question: “What is Your plan for my life?” In order to create a space to ask this question, one commits to intentional ways of living during this time, such as taking extra time for prayer, not dating, seeking the wisdom of spiritual guides, and more.
The goal of this season is to be with Jesus and to allow Him to guide you in your discernment. Because authentic discernment is founded on a living relationship with the Lord, it is helpful to have had a consistent prayer life for at least a year before entering into this season. In order to dedicate sufficient time to this important question, it is helpful to commit six months to one year for this season of discernment. At the end of this time set apart, you should intend to make a decision. It may not be the final decision of your discernment, but it is important to take the next step forward towards your vocation.
During Your Discernment:
Pray
Every vocation is the fruit of an intimate relationship of love with the Lord. Therefore, the ultimate purpose of a time of discernment is to grow in ever deeper union with God. He is with you in every moment of your discernment and wants to reveal to you the deepest desires of your heart. During this time of discernment, honestly relate to the Lord your thoughts, feelings, and desires and let Him lead and guide your heart to know and to follow Him. Daily Mass, Eucharistic Adoration, Rosary, Liturgy of the Hours, the Examen Prayer, and frequent reception of the Sacrament of Penance are helpful ways to create a space for the Lord to speak to your heart.
Read Spiritual Classics
Reading the lives of the saints and other spiritual classics on the Consecrated Life are helpful ways to understand the gift of a vocation to be set apart for God alone. The inspiring witness of their lives dedicated completely to the Lord can give you courage to offer your yes to the Lord and joyfully fulfill His plan for your life. As you read, be attentive to what draws your heart in love. These movements help reveal the desires of your heart and are helpful things to discuss with your spiritual director.
Seek Spiritual Direction
Guides along the way help us to find where we are going. Seeking a good spiritual director during your time of discernment is strongly encouraged so that he or she can help you understand the ways the Lord is working in your heart during this special season of grace. In spiritual direction, it is most fruitful to discuss spiritual matters: how is the Lord speaking to your heart in prayer? What are your fears? What are the desires that arise in your heart?
Recommended Reading:
Union With God, Bl. Columba Marmion
The Discernment of Spirits, Fr. Timothy Gallagher, O.M.V.
The Examen Prayer, Fr. Timothy Gallagher, O.M.V.
A Right to Be Merry, Mother Mary Francis, P.C.C.
“…And You Are Christ’s,” Fr. Thomas Dubay, S.M.
Vita Consecrata (Consecrated Life), St. Pope John Paul II
“He won me over entirely by giving Himself entirely to me.”-St. Bernard of Clairvaux
To date or not to date?
Every woman is created to love and be loved, to make a total gift of herself to another, to be a bride and a mother. Vocational discernment is not asking the question, “Am I called to marriage?” but rather “To whom am I to give myself totally in love?” During a season of discernment, it is important not to date in order to allow your heart to be completely available to the Lord. Regardless of the vocation the Lord calls you to, He will make fruitful the sacrifice of this time given to Him.
“So will the King desire your beauty.”-Psalm 45:12
Visit convents.
During this time of discernment, it is important to visit convents in order to grow in your understanding of the religious life. Visiting several communities allows you to experience the life from within, which helps you to know if this community is the right fit for you. If your heart is drawn to the way of life in a community return for further visits until the Lord moves your heart elsewhere.
Make a decision.
Making a decision is only the next step in the discernment process. As you act upon your convictions following a season of discernment, the Lord will continue to lead you, showing whether this decision continues to bring you peace, freedom and joy. You may not be ready to enter into your vocation, but you can still make a tangible decision: “During my season of discernment, I haven’t sensed a clear desire or invitation to the religious life, so I am going to be open to dating now.” Or, “There is something in my heart that is at peace only when I accept His promptings to be His bride, so I am going to actively discern which religious community He might want me to enter.” It is only in moving that the Lord can guide your decisions, so it is important to not remain idle, but like Mary, offer your yes to Him, trusting Him to lead.
The Lord desires your happiness and will not lead you astray. He has a beautiful plan for your life that will fulfill the deepest longings of your heart. As you follow Him, you join a multitude of men and women who have found their joy in His ways. May all the angels and saints assist you as you surrender your life to the Lord of Love!
Vocation Inquiries
To join us at a Come and See weekend, or to ask a question, please contact us. Email handmaidvocation@gmail.com
or call 952-738-1690.